Not My Fantasy Page 18

  “Where did you want us to go, milord?” Natty asked, neatly stepping aside for a rabbity-looking person toting several wheels of cheese through the portal.

  “Jakers, have these monkeys leave their contraptions inside the stables and then take them to one of the less-used sitting rooms. I don’t want His Highness’ latest piece seeing these three. I’m not sure if a competitor for his affections will help or hinder him and I’m not going to make that call myself. Once I have these idiots organised and the kitchens supplied, I’ll let His Highness know they are here and let him decide.”

  “Very good, sir,” Jakers, a tall black and white Husky-looking guy said, snapping out a quick bow and then gesturing briskly for us to follow. The boys pushed the bikes into a dusty stall, Gabe dropping down and removing something small from each with a few practised movements. I looked around; this was a stall when all the ‘animals’ were awake and it was a whole different affair to the one at the inn. The stench of human waste was strong, though partially masked by the sweeter hay. A few young deer-looking people were mucking out the stalls, kerchiefs tied across their noses and mouths. The ‘monkeys’ wailed and screeched for no reason that I could tell.

  “Hey,” I said to the closest human, “hey, are you OK?”

  Big blue eyes looked at me, blinking slowly, little movement of the pupils, then it started wailing again. “No point trying to talk to ‘em,” Jakers said. “You might have the power of speech somehow, but they ain’t got the brains nor the notion to answer you back.”

  “Yeah, but do people talk to them when they are little? If you don’t stimulate the brain cells when young–”

  “Not much stimulated but my taste buds, if y’know what I mean,” Jakers said with a toothy grin. “Now the Cap’n wants you in one of the sitting rooms, so that’s where we will go.”

  The boys grabbed the bags, Gabe certain to keep the one with the guns close to his side. We followed the wolf man’s swishy black tail with the white tip all the way into the grand entrance to the citadel. I stopped to gape at the intricate plaster ceilings, the beautiful paintings and the massive chandelier that seemed big enough to encompass a regular-sized room. Perhaps that was what led to our impromptu meeting with the prince.

  “Jakers! Thank goodness, where is Captain Mellors? The feast must be just so and Cookie is saying she can’t possibly bake the blancmange without fresh. . . .” He was tall, as tall as Gabe though without the same hard power. Instead, he was a long, lean picture of elegance. Oddly, he wore a three-piece suit that hung on his body in clean, sharp lines, but in a place where clothing seemed to be optional and mainly used to indicate rank or position, it was weird to see one of them in proper clothes. Admittedly, not having fur anymore may have been a contributing factor. He had dark hair slicked back from his face in a slightly dishevelled sweep and the oddest yellow eyes I’d ever seen. They couldn’t be mistaken for hazel or green, no they were pale and intense, especially when they swung my way. He paused mid-sentence, looking me up and down and then an open smile spread across his face, a smile that I realised was used to containing more teeth. “And who do we have here?”

  “Ashley McKinnon, Your Highness,” I said, bobbing a quick curtsey. Mum had made us do ballroom dancing for one horrible year, though I hoped that would be sufficient as I hadn’t learned much else.

  “Lady Ashley, I am Damon, Crown Prince of Damorica, Earl of the Outer Isles and Grand Commander of the combined forces.”

  “Natty, your lordship.” Natty held out a paw but was left hanging, Damon’s eyes not leaving mine; instead he reached for my hand, staring as he slowly drew it to his lips. “Gump remembered that you were looking for sentient monkeys and sent this one along.”

  “Monkeys?” the prince’s eyes finally swung towards Natty. “We’ll not use that term under my roof! Hoo-man, I believe, is the preferred term?”

  “Human and yes, that’s correct, though you may want to circulate a memo to your soldiers, I’ve lost count of the number of times we’ve been called pinkies or monkeys.” Damon’s back snapped upright and his gaze shifted to a now restive Jakers.

  “Is this true?”

  “Your Highness, if I could just–”

  “Is this true?”

  “Yes, Your Highness–”

  Damon crossed the space between him and the soldier, grabbing the wolf-man by the scruff of the neck and drawing his face close to Jakers. “You might want to alert all that operate within this citadel that derogatory remarks against hoo-mans are derogatory remarks against their prince.”

  “Of course, milord! Right away.” Damon let the man go with a shake, probably thinking that his macho display was super-hot. Instead, I was chilled by his lighting fast show of temper.

  “Now, milady, we must set you up in one of our finer rooms. Your men will be happy in the stables, won’t they?”

  “Unfortunately, I can’t possibly live without my bodyguards,” I said in reply. “While I know you understand how to treat humans, we have not received that same consideration in other parts of your realm.”

  “Came a-cropper of Gump did you? He’s an unruly fiend but useful. I can promise you that no further insult to your person will happen within my walls.”

  “And yet, I must insist. My father heard of your predicament and sent me here to help, Your Highness, but only with the protection of my guards. If I cannot keep them, I’m afraid I would need to return to my own dimension.”

  Damon paused for a moment, the only sign of tension was the muscle working in his jaw. Finally, he forced himself to smile and nodded, “Of course, my lady, anything to make your stay a welcome one. Now, if you please–?”

  “Damon? Are you around? I ended up having a nap and was having the–" Damon’s face fell, the furtive eyes and attempt to conceal me behind the big wall of his body amusing, as it appeared guys getting caught with a side chick was a universal experience. “Damon? Oh!” I took a step to the side to meet the eyes of my sister. She was dressed in some kind of dress, a froth of white satin and lace, her eyes starkly blue in her face. I made a barely perceptible shake of my head, hoping to Christ I could get her to be reasonable and not make a scene. The time for revealing our relationship was not now.

  “May I present the Lady Ashley of McKinnon?” Damon said, a tiny quiver in his voice.

  “I’m a friend of His Highness’s family,” I said, “we go way back, played together as children. I’ve come for a long overdue visit.” I held out a hand and slowly, Tess took it.

  “Tess Pendragon,” she said gravely.

  “Lovely to meet you. Have you been at the citadel long?”

  “No, only a day, though it feels much longer. The place is a wonder.”

  “That is generous of you to say,” Damon replied. “It is merely a pale imitation of the splendour of our former palace in the capital, but we do the best with what we have. Now, my Tess, if you’ll excuse me for a moment, I must set her ladyship and her entourage up in one of the rooms. Can I come to yours afterwards and then we can take that walk?”

  “Of course,” Tess said, “though if your ladyship permits, I’d love to call on her before then.”

  “Oh, they’ll still be washing the dirt–” the prince said.

  “I would love that,” I said.

  “Then I’d best change into something more appropriate for walking. I’ll wait here for you, Your Highness?”

  Damon blinked as if trying to keep it all straight in his head. “Yes, I will return to you as swiftly as possible.”

  I fought the urge to giggle as Damon swept us up the stairs, gesturing for more deer-looking servers to carry our bags, much to Gabe’s disconcertion. “This is the Lily suite,” Damon said, opening the door on an airy set of rooms with pale-yellow walls and ornate white moulding. Fat candles sat in gilded sconces on the walls and an intricately-woven rug in purple, yellow, and white covered the floor. “I have to admit, this was not what I expected to see inside a citadel,” I said.

&nbs
p; “You like it? My grandmother was responsible for the renovation. She turned it from an old battlement to a summer home for when the city grew too oppressive. She would be appalled it was reverting back to its original use.”

  “You’re preparing for war?”

  “No, no,” he said, a little too quickly, “but it now houses all of my personal guard and those in the military still loyal to the throne. You are aware of the revolution?” I nodded. He sighed, “There was a time it was a place of pleasure, where those close to us could relax and enjoy.”

  “Well, perhaps it can be a place of pleasure again?” Yeah, I said it. I figured laying on a bit of flirtation would keep him off balance and from observing us too closely. His eyes jerked to me and widened. Oh yeah, looks like someone has taken the bait.

  “Allow me to say how much I appreciate your . . . tact in dealing with Lady Tess. She blundered into this world and was scooped up by Gump and sent here. You have seen how badly hoo-mans are treated here, what else could I do but offer her sanctuary?” Was that with or without salt and pepper? I thought.

  “Of course, Your Highness.”

  “But to have a lady of such obvious breeding and taste in my home . . .” OK, now I had to bite down on my cheek to stop myself from laughing. I had on an old pair of Converse with holes in them, faded jeans and a t-shirt with a stain on it. Yeah, I was all class. “You are correct, that truly is a pleasure.”

  He had it all going on, which worried me deeply. The gaze boring into me, making sure I knew I was his entire focus, he moved into my personal space, so I could feel the heat radiating from his body, the good looks and the confidence: these were all pussy killers and I had to make sure he didn’t use them to kill my sister, literally. “I know you are a busy, important man, but if you have some time tomorrow?” I said.

  “Of course, be assured I long to spend some time getting to know you better, milady. I will have the seating plan changed for dinner and have you by my side.”

  “Is that wise?” I asked. “The other young lady, poor thing that she is, obviously feels entitled to some precedence. I am a patient woman and would not want to see another young lady languish on my account.”

  “Well, milady, you are being most accommodating. I admit I was overcome by your beauty and failed to think of how Lady Pendragon would take this. If you are quite sure?”

  “Yes, of course.”

  “Well, then I will alert the lady that I will be indisposed tomorrow, catching up with childhood friends.” He looked like all of his Christmases had come at once, a red flush of pleasure spreading over his pale skin. He doesn’t really know how to smile like a human, I observed, if he practised in the mirror he’d look a whole lot less like a hungry wolf.

  “What was that?” Gabe asked when the door closed behind the prince.

  “It appears racking up debts against the hairy credit card works with furries just as well as human men,” I said. “What? I can’t just announce that Tess is my sister and I’m here to make sure he doesn’t eat her. I feel like a total bitch, making a play for him, but this is a matter of life and death.”

  “You did alright with the snobby talk,” Flea said, eyeing me almost suspiciously.

  “I don’t know if I did. My brain was desperately trawling through memories of the month long Jane Austen binge Tess and I went on a few years ago. All I remember is everyone was vicious while being exquisitely polite and women never made decisions, just suggested things to their menfolk to get what they wanted. It makes me want to punch people right in the chemise, but I don’t know what else we can do.”

  “Not sure if she even saw me,” Flea said, dropping down on the bed. “She looked bloody happy to go walkies with dog boy there. What if she doesn’t want to see me?”

  “Oh, she’s going to see us alright,” I said.

  27

  It didn’t take long for me to prove I was right. We’d unpacked and had baths (there was running water here, thank God!) and gotten changed into something less travel-worn when my door slammed open. “What the fuck are you lot doing here?” Tess said.

  “Well, hello to you, too, sister dear.”

  “I left you a note . . .”

  “Yes, we all got the notes, Tess. Thank you for telling me you were leaving our realm for inter-dimensional travel in four short sentences, I do so appreciate it.”

  “God! You are so insufferably smothering. You’re here because you thought I’d get hurt and you’d need to ride to the rescue, right?”

  “You are about to get hurt and will get killed if we don’t get you out of here!”

  “What? You think I’m falling for the prince’s shit? I know what he wants from me, but there’s hardly a risk of me falling in love with him.”

  “Oh really? You were crushing on the animated Beast for weeks after we watched it.”

  “When I was eight!”

  “He’s good-looking, royalty, from another world full of wonders and lots and lots of people who must cough up fur balls on a regular basis.”

  Tess rubbed her hands over her eyes and then threw them in the air, “You don’t get it; you never have.”

  “You OK Tess?” Flea asked. He’d been hovering in the background, but when he saw Tess distressed, it seemed he had to come forward. He walked over, then stopped short, not sure if he should approach her, then visibly steeling himself, went and placed a hand on her shoulder. Her head jerked up and her eyes widened when she saw who it was. “Sorry, not trying to be that stalker guy after a one night stand, but girl, we were all worried. If you thought the note was enough to keep us sweet, you were wrong.”

  “I tossed up whether or not to leave it all,” she said.

  “And allow your family to think you were dead in a ditch? C’mon, you know you wouldn’t do that,” I said.

  “You can’t trust me with this, can you?” she said, her face going white. “That’s what it is, what it always is. You have to be there, to oversee, to direct, to make sure we get the right outcome. Tess is a screw-up, Tess is incompetent.”

  “It’s not that; you’ve just had a couple of rough spots . . .,” I said in a low murmur.

  “Really? Really? That’s what you’re going with?”

  “Well, the stuff with Ken wasn’t ideal, but you weren’t to know. He didn’t look like the kind of guy that would steal your–”

  “Fuck, Ash, you really are unbelievable. What have you done since graduation, hmm?”

  “I got my degree–”

  “In political science. Any job offers come out of that?”

  “Well, no, but I didn’t do it for–”

  “And what were you doing before Nan gave us the shop?”

  “Ah, mistresses–” Natty said.

  “What? There’s nothing wrong with temping. It was a way–”

  She fixed me with a hard look, arms crossing her chest, “That’s the thing, Ash, you were waddling around in total mediocrity. You were capable of doing way better, but you scraped in a Year Twelve result that was just enough to get into a Bachelor of Arts at a uni Mum would pay for. Then you coasted along at that, taking another year to get it done when you realised you would have to up your game to pass. Then you’ve floated from one temporary gig to another, white-collar, of course, or Mum would have a shit-fit, and you have the audacity to critique my life. Where’s your life? Apart from the biker boyfriend that I brought into it, where’s your life?”

  “I’m sorry, I get you ladies are having a very exciting Jerry Springer moment right now, but what?” Gabe said.

  “Don’t worry about it,” I said, waving him off.

  “Ash, don’t–” Gabe began to say with a frown, but Tess saw her moment and seized it.

  “We live under a spell, a curse, I don’t know, but our grandmother put it on us when she died.”

  “Tess, don’t,” I said, for the first time this evening, feeling a very real wave of fear begin to build.

  “So?” Gabe said.

  “The spell, it do
oms Ash to meet characters from whatever book or movie I look at the previous day.”

  “Tess, for the love of God! I’ll–” I said.

  “So, what?” Gabe looked at me, then Tess, then back again. “Is that what you think I am? Some . . . character? From a book?”

  “I was reading the Wild Ryder series the night before you turned up at the shop, figured Ash always had a thing for guys who are a bit rough around the edges. She didn’t like Prince Charming or King Arthur, so. . . .”

  “So I’m . . . some Sons of Anarchy Mills and Boons knockoff?”

  “Ah . . . Master Gabriel, Mistress Ash—” Natty said.

  “Shut up, Natty!”

  “I’d love to, seriously. Right now I’m thinking the trip back to town can’t be as bad as this, even if it is night and there’s marauding bands of feral monkeys, but as much as it pains me to point this out, our hearing is obviously much better than yours is,” Natty replied, arms crossed over his chest.

  “So?”

  “Well, what you think is some private little spat is probably not as private as you think.”

  That stopped the three of us cold. Tess, Gabe and I looked around the room. Not sure why, the door was closed; we had no idea who lingered outside in the hallway.

  “You have your sister, we can leave tonight and be back in the city, to the portal in about three days,” Natty said.

  “We should make a break while we can,” Flea said. “Gabe’s got the bikes in the barn below and a bag full of guns—”

  Tess’s eyes came to rest on mine. I saw the flat, empty gaze there and knew that somehow, we had made a very big mistake. “This is a rescue operation, isn’t it?”

  “Tess, we just—”

  “You came here, assuming that I would screw up, assuming I’d make some huge mistake and need to be bailed out,” Tess’s voice was completely devoid of emotion. She swallowed and then drew herself up tall. “Whatever I’ve done, whatever the prince intends, this is my problem, mine to solve. I wish you’d never come here. I wish you didn’t feel the need to try and take over my life all the time and I especially wish you weren’t my sister. You should leave.”